Reasonable Expectations

I am often asked if I have anxiety about results of scans, tests, and reoccurrence. Of course there are questions and concerns, but I can say with all sincerity, I am fairly calm and don’t dwell on this. I never play the “what if” game. I believe this is a result of the healthy denial I have often referred to. It is an astonishing mix of fragility and ferocity. I have the capability to eliminate this from my mind or at the very least, move it to the back burner. 

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Nothing Grows in Comfort Zones

When was the last time you did something for the first time? I had a new experience recently, taking a writing class with Jennifer Louden, a best selling author. Reading about this in the Paris Review, I stepped out of my comfort zone and plunged in, head first. The setting: 1440 Multiversity in Scotts Valley, CA. Named for the 1440 minutes in a day, 1440 is founded on the belief that each minute is a chance to connect with what truly matters—both within and around us.

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If Only They Knew...

I, like so many, am reeling from the suicides of Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain. I am struck by the tremendous impact that Kate Spade had on people everywhere. It is even more extraordinary knowing that she wasn’t overly present for the past decade, which speaks volumes for the emotional connection to the brand and what she stood for.

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Give More Than You Take

A recent dinner conversation inspired me to share these thoughts with you. Lovely friends, Kelly and Harry, had just returned from touring the house they were moving to in a few days. On several occasions, the owners graced them with detailed descriptions of the fabulous furniture, accessories and art that would now be in their new living space. The husband had previously regaled them with fascinating stories of the history and provenance of the priceless works of art – valuable antiques, a Baccarat chandelier, precious rugs, art dating back centuries – all museum quality. The wife would describe how these were acquired, the rarity and value, which in some ways, was daunting!

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Women Supporting Women, There's Nothing Better

I have struggled writing this blog, finding it impossible to finish a thought with tears welling up and at times, completely incapable of writing. I have a catalog of strong emotions when I think about my girlfriends and what they have given me. We know that a single event cannot only shape your life, but illuminate it. Being told I have pancreatic cancer did both of these for me. 

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Love Is A Gift, For No Reason At All

While the holidays are known for being a time of joy and cheer, that may not be the case for somebody who is sick, struggling physically or mentally, fighting for their life, or less fortunate than us.  We live in an age consumed by things.  And, it is no more evident than at this time of year.  The frenzy of shopping, crowds, long lines, large credit card bills – it is assumed that happiness can be gift-wrapped.

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Thankful. Grateful. Blessed.

Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday. I pay particular attention to the very good life I am fortunate to live and the countless things I am grateful for. The holidays can bring out all kinds of emotions – incredibly joy spending time with family and friends, enjoying a beautiful meal together, taking a bit of well-deserved vacation – but it can also be stressful. 

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The Most Important Day Of The Year: World Pancreatic Cancer Day

World Pancreatic Cancer Day is November 16th. Eleven years ago, this would not have been noteworthy me to. I barely knew the role of the pancreas and no one in my world had been affected by the disease. About 1.5 years before my first distinct symptom of pancreatic cancer, on a whim, I decided (and did) participate in a 100 mile bike ride in the mountains of Aspen. It is only eleven years later that would I realize the significance of this crazy adventure.

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How A Gratitude Journal Kept Me Going

I was recently thinking back on a very low point in my cancer journey.  Every little undertaking seemed monumental.  Everyday things I took for granted that were performed with energy, enthusiasm and often with little effort, were now overwhelming.  My road to recovery was not a straightforward path, in fact there was nothing encouraging about it at all.  

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The Time I Lost My Wig

I love the outdoors; there is never enough to satisfy me with the abundant beauty that exists everywhere. I love exercising in nature’s magnificence. I love spending time with my friends in the simplest or most challenging of elements, connecting with mind, body and soul, coupled with surprises and unexpected pleasures around every corner. It is all intoxicating!

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A Man I Call ‘Dr. Evil’...Who Is Anything But!

I was at a stage in my life where I had to be fearlessly and relentlessly true to myself.  I barely knew what the pancreas did when I was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer in 2006.  I was overcome with shock, fear and so many unanswered questions...what do I do next? These emotions consumed every part of my being. Overwhelmed and terrified does not begin to describe what I was feeling.

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